Pain makes us.. who we are

Pain.. sometimes I wonder why are we so scared of it. We are driven to move in the opposite direction. Pain is considered to be a negative in our lives. Today, I am going to talk a little about pain and the tears that it brings and also its effect on us.

Pain, is painful. No doubts. Everyone has gone through sufferings in their lives for some reason. Loosing a person we love, getting hurt in love, not getting enough from someone we love dearly, failures in terms of studies, career, loosing a job, struggle to get fame etc.

But, have we realized one thing? Pain, struggle, suffering and failures are so important in our lives. I have seen people becoming strong enough to face the most difficult times as they have tasted the suffering. Struggle, polishes our souls to not give up and keep trying.

There are people, although a few of them, who are born worthy. They have money, comforts, love and everything they need, is just a click away from them. They, don’t even know what struggle is, how is it like to be suffering, how does it feel to be in pain. I personally feel that when they are presented with struggle in their lives, they tend to loose their heart easily.

Here is an example. I was born in 70s in a middle class family. We, as children didn’t know the meaning of luxury. It was a dream to sit in a car in those times. We struggled through life to achieve what we have today. While growing up, we pushed our limits to be in a better position and without a doubt we suffered as well. I even lost a family member at an early age and honestly speaking, I was too young to understand the loss. But while growing up, I missed that person in each possible way. It had an impact on the monetary condition, emotional security, social pressure and a lot more. I always used to think that had I not lost that dear member of my family, things would have been much better and different.

Now, in my late 30s, I realize that I am a much stronger person today. I have seen all kind of struggle in my life. I have born pain to a great extent and that has made me kind of ready for it whenever it chooses to knock on my door the next time. Our experiences change us and polish us to be who we turn out to be.

And hence, I am glad today to have born pain my life. I am glad today to have faced struggle throughout. I still miss my dearest family member whom I lost and nothing can ever fill that gap, yet I am glad that I decided to fight and took the situation in a positive way to make me believe in myself. I now feel that I can face any damn situation in my life and I am ready to learn more from the experiences to come my way through this journey of life.

A survivor, a warrior…

Let me know what you think!

mySestina life journey of pain.

 

the day never arrived

the day never arrived

I was aware, yet I chose to lie to my heart

two things for me to win his affection

were either love or blood

I had none

neither he shared his blood with me

nor he ever fell in love with me

I craved for him to be mine

not just with the body but his soul

the day never arrived

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regret

regret

many times, i told him

i was dying from the inside

every day, each moment of my life

the air between us not enough

to let me breathe

my heart felt suffocated

a million times, his hand i tried to reach

he was there sitting by my side

yet no sign of him till far away

my soul neglected bruised

i decided to wait for a little longer

every time i told me

he shall hold me in a little more while

today, i depart to stay in heaven

he is remained with nothing

but regret

with nothing

but to miss me by his side

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Her Insecurities

Her Insecurities

 morning, was bright & shining
with life all around
there were birds singing
as I touched my feet to the ground

give me a hug my princess
dad caressed my forehead
come, have your breakfast sweety
said mom with milk & bread
this world really was a perfect place
until, I stepped out of the gate

walking my way to college
they started to follow
lewd notes on my frame
made my spirit hollow

there was a push & hit
didn’t know what to think
ran as hard as i could
it was torn – my hood

my world became horrid & bent
i pinched myself to check
if it was a nightmare
or was i even breathing

i die a thousand deaths
to see that I am not safe
why for me in the whole world
my home is the only place

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music of his kind

as i entrusted him

with the guitar of my heart

as i entrusted him

to play the flute of my emotions

he ended up playing

the music of his kind

it was the music he only liked

on which i ended up dancing

all my life

 

i went ahead…

i went ahead…

they told me not to

informed me of the consequences

my well wishers pulled me back desperately

in hope of saving me from what was to come

yet i went ahead as i wanted to rise

instead, i fell in love

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serve me pain

serve me pain

serve me pain, serve me sorrow

torturing wind as it blows

injects a little immortality in me

nothing you shall gain

for my limits to consume pain

are beyond eternity

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my merciless heart

my merciless heart

i curse my heart

to grant access to agony

to let it proceed through its valves

to travel to every bit of my body

like blood

i curse my heart

to challenge

the strength of my brain

to keep me safe from pain

oh this heart…. it has no mercy for me…

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