That Darkest Moment

That Darkest Moment

This is about a little girl who lost her father at the age of 7. She had a younger brother and their mom was just 25 when  this tragic thing happened. This girl and her brother hadn’t even realized how their world was going to change from then on. The struggle started in their lives.

Mother struggling to earn and take care of the children without any support. She struggled with her emotions as she was so deeply in love with her husband whom she had lost. She couldn’t cry tears of pain so that she would not make her children feel scared or weak.

The girl started to wonder why her mother had stopped putting on any makeup and why does she now always wears dull color clothes. She often ran to her mother with a lipstick and requested her to wear it. And her mother would refuse (back then, in a hindu family, a widow was not allowed to wear bright colors or any kind of makeup).

Then came a day, her mother told her that their father was coming back. That he was gone for a while and now he is returning. The girl knew in her heart, its not her father, its going to be her step father, but looking at the shine on her mother’s face, she kept quite. She was surely happy about something – that her mother would start wearing bright colors and wear a lipstick or a nail paint again.

Life after that was full of struggle. Much more than it was earlier.

Years passed, the girl was now 34. She had her own children now. One day, sitting next to her mom breastfeeding her baby, her mother spoke to share how she felt when she lost her husband.

It was the first time ever she talked about the same.

She said,

“Your father was a very nice man, he helped me with everything. He was working at a high level in an organization, the same company gave me a job after his death on the basis of his seniority. He had 2 heart attacks and the third one took his life. He was hospitalized for about a month and i used to visit him everyday in the morning after sending you and your brother to the school. But that day, that dark day, i just entered the elevator in the hospital and saw a nurse with whom i got familiar with in that past one month. I greeted the nurse good morning and usually she would she would greet me back the same. But that day, she replied back saying, don’t you know?”

“The floor under my feet froze. I wanted to jump out through the half open door of the elevator. Few other people in the elevator stopped me. “

“That moment, that one moment was the most uncertain moment of my life. I could not consume, what had just happened. I had you and your  brother aged 7 and 5 and here I just lost my husband.”

The girl heard her mother talking her heart.

The irony of different perspectives brought tears to her eyes, that when her mother was going through the darkest moment of her life, as a child, she was busy thinking about why her mother would not wear any make up anymore!!


image source : google

from a Little Height

from a Little Height

on the top of the mountain

as I stood and looked down

the city didn’t look the same to me

to my wonderment, it seemed another

thousands of dim lights twinkled at me

never thought it would look so different

from a distance, from a little height

all those people walked in union

the markets didn’t seem conjested anymore

the cars running, injecting life into the roads

the stunning map view of the city

made it look flawless, somehow a little fresh

I couldn’t see no hunger, no poverty

there didn’t seem to be any dirt on the streets

kids laughing, racing to catch a kite

how I felt the lost zeal coming to life

I thought to myself

the city isn’t as dull as I thought it was

it’s still full of charm that needs to be discovered

I still could find happiness there, had I endeavoured

today, I realize the lost beauty of the city

may be because I am looking at it

from a distance, from a little height

I am watching the city

from the top of the mountain

image source

#city #perspective #poetry

Broadening the Horizon

Broadening the Horizon

images dangling in ones head

anticipations, expectations

thoughtful observations

existence, survival

the chasing race

sitting under the tree of wisdom

counting the uncountable number of leaves

beginning to consume the limitless

everyday, with each moment passing

researching, redefining

scarcity of time refuses to permit

innumerable fields be excelled

yet, to accomplish the most

must we consider to begin

to expand

the horizon of our deeds